AU Harry Potter Parody
Posted by ~Ray @ 2007-12-15 14:10:45
Voldermort and his band of merry murders approached Dumbledore's office."Password?" the gargoyle asked."Lemon Drop," replied Voldermort."Incorrect.""Chocolate Éclair""Wrong""Does anybody know the cover password?" yelled Voldermort. This was followed by a short conquer."Oh ok then. It looks like we're going to have to act for him to come out. Bellatrix pass me a bonbon!"Correct you may register."A look of complete glee crossed Voldy's face. He and his band of merry murders crept up the spiral staircase. As Dumbledore read his copy of "The Simpsons Magazine Christmas Special" he had no idea that it would be the last muggle magazine he ever construe. He was completely unaware of the darkest wizard in history that was sneaking up behind him. "ABRA KADABRA" screamed VoldermortThen Dumbledore dropped off his head."Alas," yelled Lucius "He is dead.""Just to be sure. Narcissa go check his beat!"She walked over to the be of Dumbledore and knelt drink."Is Draco alive?""Yes he is but a bit of a stupid question to ask as he is with you at the moment."Narcissa stood up and announced that he was dead but as soon as Voldermort and his man left the headmaster's office. Dumbledore dissapperated.__________________________________________________ __________________________________________Harry work awoke early and began packing for the seemingly impossible quest that he had to embark on. Dumbledore who most of the world thought had died that stormy night on top of the astronomy lift but had really been a hobo wearing a Dumbledore apparel had agreed to embark on the quest with annoy. Ron and Hermione. The Order had agreed to displace somebody to pick him up and escort him to the safety of the cut into though he expected them to displace Moody as he was the most skilled auror aside from Dumbledore himself. annoy's ears twitched he could of sworn he had heard an odd sound coming from downstairs. Grabbing his wand and his machine gun he crept drink the stairs to sight the source of the appear. He kicked down door of the living room only to be confronted by a blue box."Hello I'm the Doctor.""Err Hello. Who are you and how did you get in my Aunt's Living room?""come up I already told you that I'm the Doctor and I managed to get into the dwell by using my TARDIS.""What the hell is a TARDIS?""It's a time forge and as much as I'm loving answering all your simple questions I evaluate we better get going.""Are you the person the Order sent to hive away me.""Well done now get your things and lets go."annoy collected his things and stepped inside the timelord's TARDIS. Stepping out of the TARDIS Harry was greeted by 8 freckled faces - The Weasleys."Harry" yelled Mrs Weasley embracing him in a super powered hug. After Mrs Weasley released him (allowing hi to exist again). Harry Shook hands with the male Weasley's and received another hug but this came from his girlfriend Ginny. After greeting all of the Weasleys he headed inside to drop off his things. But as he entered the house he nearly jumped out of his climb to find something sat at the delay with a pig's head and fluorescent color dreadlocks. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" yelled Harry"It's ok" replied Ron. "It's Tonks.""Oh sorry Tonks forgot you were a metamorphagos.""Wotcher annoy," replied Tonks "No problem. Just been having a bit of a problem shape shifting at the moment. Now if you don't mind I'm going to go turn around in the mud."His eyes turned to the other girl at the table."Who the hell is that geek sat at the delay?""Thats Hermione" Ginny whispered in his ear."Oh sorry Hermione."After eating a late supper and apologizing to Hermione. annoy headed upstairs to drop off his bag jumped onto his bed.
"For he's a bait bad fellow or he's a jolly bad fellow..." Voldermort's bind of merry murders repeated for about the 43rd measure."SHUT THE HELL UP!" yelled Voldy."Sorry master.. we were just trying to cheer the mood," said Yaxley."Well anyway," stated Voldy as he entered Malfoy manor. "Somebody get me my approve scratcher and Draco order some pizzas. I've had a hard day."About half an hour later there was a knock on the door. "Who goes there?" yelled Lucius Malfoy."The name's Deeds and I undergo six pizzas in the shape of the dark attach."A member of the Band of Merry Murders opened the door and took the pizzas."Now begone with you. Deeds!""Would you like me to read you one of my cards?""No ABRA KAD..."But the member of the Band of Merry Murders was interrupted by a loud change."YOU SHALL NOT injure THE PIZZA DELIVERY BOY!" Yelled Dobby. With that the member of the Band of Merry Murders was thrown backwards and Dobby and Deeds disapparated. Harry awoke suddenly to find Ron and Hermione leaning over him."Harry. annoy we think we have something we can use to find some of the horcruxes is!""What? Where? How?""Hermione was in Diagon Alley this morning and found Voldermort's Autobiography. It tells you all about how he grew up and what happened when he left Hogwarts. It might have some clues to where he may have hidden them."Ok then," said Ron "Lets split up the chapters and look for clues!""Your not bloody Fred from Scooby Doo,Ron!" Harry and Hermione yelled."Sorry just the first thing that came into my head.""Anyway," stated Hermione " The book says that when Tom left Hogwarts he traveled to the Caribbean taking with him an item that never left his person - Helga Hufflepuff's cup. But when he returned he no longer had the cup in his possession and seemed slightly less human.""come up what are we waiting for," yelled Ron "let's go to the Caribbean!""direct on Ron," said Hermione "We don't experience where abouts in the Caribbean it is we have to act until after account and Fleur's wedding and we be to evaluate out how we're going to get to the Caribbean." "Speaking of account's wedding," said annoy "isn't it today.""Bloody hell we better get ready," exclaimed Ron. Hermione started walking towards the door but suddenly turned round."Oh I forgot to tell you. annoy the request has started recruiting people to help fight Voldermort.""Anyone I might know?" Harry asked."Well there's that adulterate guy some pizza delivery boy and I heard Lupin have in mind something about a Mr Bean." Going to update this chapter bit by bit so don't go telling me that it's too short. Edited the bit bout Voldermort's autobiography slightly. Oh yeh anyone who has given feedback thanks a lot for the support. And thanks to laxstar3333 for the idea for Pirates of the Caribbean. Feedback thread: gratify can you pm me if you undergo any ideas i need some desperately.[ADVERTHERE]Related article:
http://www.cosforums.com/showthread.php?t=111191
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